I'm pretty torn up about Mac Miller's death. This feels like the first musician that I grew up with that's tragically passed away. His death kept me up the night it was announced, and my mind had difficulty processing a musical soul gone way, way too early.

From 2010, I watched a young, silly, goofy white rapper from Pittsburgh rap dumb songs about Donald Trump while showing his potential with "Kool Aid and Frozen Pizza" and "Nikes on My Feet. " He knew he had something behind that always cheesin’ half smile on his face in videos like he was in on the surprise that he was blowing up too.

Miller moved out to L.A. and started taking music more seriously; consequently, he started taking drugs more seriously, ultimately leading to his overdose. It really is a tragedy because his most recently released album, the phenomenal Swimming, and without a doubt his best album to date, an album that started to show his growth as a lyricist, showed that this guy had range and ingenuity.

He wrote songs with John Mayer, Thundercat, Jon Brion, and Dev Hynes on this album. He was really searching and finding something despite all his clear troubles. Swimming is a really sad album that holds onto a sliver of hope in a heavy ocean, but it was so clear he was finding himself as a musician.

This all felt like an accident. I have a feeling this wasn't purposeful considering there were allegedly other people in the house. But it's hard to say for sure as Miller's depression and problems are well-worn territory.

The outpouring of love Mac Miller got from EVERYONE was overwhelming and reinforcement of the great, caring, charismatic guy that he was. I will truly miss this guy, and I'll always come back to this playlist to remind me of his talent, and I'll always listen to Swimming knowing that this guy really became a real musician.

The first track of this mixtape, which is also the first track of his new album, sums all of Mac's problems and hopes into one:

I just need a way out of my head
I'll do anything for a way out of my head
In my own way this feel like living
Some alternate reality
And I was I was drowning
but now I'm swimming
Through stressful waters to relief
Oh, the things I’d do
To spend a little time in hell
And what I won’t tell you
I’ll probably never even tell myself
And don’t you know that sunshine don’t feel right
when you’re inside all day
I wish it was nice out
But it look like rain
Grey skies are drifting, not living forever
They told me it only gets better…

RIP Mac.